trekking on down memory lane

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last night found me at hippiefest with hubbie, daughter, daughter’s friend, and a friend of my own from long ago. as we trekked down memory lane, remembering through familiar songs sung by men who sang them back in the day – the names and the tunes familiar if not the aged voices.

i remembered a girl who not only loved to stitch and sew, embellish plain closet doors with collages of photos of things that captured her attention, repaint furniture to suit . . . i remembered a girl who loved to wear pretty clothes (and on whom clothes looked pretty)

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(sorry for fuzzy picture – i’m auditioning new cameras, and this one is obviously not The One.)

i remembered a girl who read everything she could get her hands on, a girl who collected words and copied sentences she liked and wrote stories.

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i remembered a girl for whom music was a jet plane, taking her wherever she needed . . . or wanted . . . to go in a mere measure or two, music that also provided an escape hatch, allowing her to vacate moods and memories that she wanted to leave. a girl who played colorful tunes on the piano like her grandmother before her.

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i remembered falling in deep, instantaneous love with a man who has never once asked me to be more than who i am, accepting (if not understanding) that who i am is subject to frequent change, even while who i really am remains the same.

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and then somewhere in the night, i found myself looking forward, thinking and wondering about the future, knowing i did not have to/would not leave the future up to chance. that’s when i decided to do what so many others have done before me: make a list of things i still want to do. so today i got out pen and paper and started My The List.

i was on fire – jotting things like this was my only chance, and in the end, i came up with a list of 3 things.

count them: 3.

oh, i actually came up with many, many more – it’s just that i got all hung up on what’s a real desire worthy of going on My The List and what’s merely a to do and what’s something i feel like i ought to put on My The List because it seems like it’s something i ought to to want to do.

maybe it’s the brownies from last night.

16 Comments

  1. quiltdivajulie

    Brownies or not – I remember spending hours listening to records, but I was millions of miles away (on a plane, a steamer, a camel…) ~ my mother understood, my father only complained that I played the same songs again and again and again … somewhere along the line I learned to hide my secret journeys so they wouldn’t ‘bother’ him ~ something I wish had never happened.

    I’m glad you remembered … I’m trying to!

    • ever jeanne

      i was bad (still am, actually) to listen to the same song over and over and over and over again. will often eat the same thing over and over and over again till i’ve had enough. it’s just how i am.

  2. quiltdivajulie

    Brownies or not – I remember spending hours listening to records, but I was millions of miles away (on a plane, a steamer, a camel…) ~ my mother understood, my father only complained that I played the same songs again and again and again … somewhere along the line I learned to hide my secret journeys so they wouldn’t ‘bother’ him ~ something I wish had never happened.

    I’m glad you remembered … I’m trying to!

    • ever jeanne

      i was bad (still am, actually) to listen to the same song over and over and over and over again. will often eat the same thing over and over and over again till i’ve had enough. it’s just how i am.

  3. Acey

    well after reading this one i have decided we are not twins separated at birth we are *actually the same person* split into two …

    • ever jeanne

      or mirror images . . .

  4. Fran

    I’m so glad you were able to remember this time of inspiration and innocence! It’s so important for all of us to recapture that every so often. I look forward to hearing more about your THE List!

    • ever jeanne

      continue to struggle with My The List. breakfasted with a friend, told her about it, and she said she prefers to float. that making a My The List is just too much trouble. she could be right.

  5. Fran

    I’m so glad you were able to remember this time of inspiration and innocence! It’s so important for all of us to recapture that every so often. I look forward to hearing more about your THE List!

    • ever jeanne

      continue to struggle with My The List. breakfasted with a friend, told her about it, and she said she prefers to float. that making a My The List is just too much trouble. she could be right.

  6. Acey

    well after reading this one i have decided we are not twins separated at birth we are *actually the same person* split into two …

    • ever jeanne

      or mirror images . . .

  7. jude

    i remember waking up in the middle of the night, well, about 10 years ago. i was in a terrible fright. i was overwhelmed with all the time that had passed and that i had forgotten where i was going, what i wanted to do…and i was so old! there was no time left.
    i eventually fell back asleep. when i woke up in the morning i decided that what i really wanted was pancakes. they were great. and then my life resumed as usual.

  8. jude

    i remember waking up in the middle of the night, well, about 10 years ago. i was in a terrible fright. i was overwhelmed with all the time that had passed and that i had forgotten where i was going, what i wanted to do…and i was so old! there was no time left.
    i eventually fell back asleep. when i woke up in the morning i decided that what i really wanted was pancakes. they were great. and then my life resumed as usual.

  9. ever jeanne

    well, i think you have another book right here. things get so darn exaggerated for me at nighttime when there’s so much room, so much space, so much time to expand. the sun goes down, everybody goes to bed, and whoosh my mind is off and galloping.

  10. ever jeanne

    well, i think you have another book right here. things get so darn exaggerated for me at nighttime when there’s so much room, so much space, so much time to expand. the sun goes down, everybody goes to bed, and whoosh my mind is off and galloping.

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